PCOS: What's Going On?

Good morning everyone!
I want to start off this post by having you fill in these few blank spaces.

"Hello. My name is ______. I know ______ about PCOS"

So what did you fill in for that second spot? Maybe you said you know nothing, little, a lot, or everything. Maybe you have PCOS. Maybe you know someone who has PCOS (Hint: if you're reading this, you know someone with PCOS). Maybe the letters PCOS mean absolutely nothing to you other than they're 4 letters that might mean something.

After looking through my previously written blog posts and getting an overwhelming amount of support on my last post, I realized that although people probably see me post about my infertility issues and PCOS, they probably have no idea what's going on. This can be hard for both you, the reader, and me, the one going through it all.

So let's just get this all out in the open.

PCOS stands for Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. The cysts are not harmful in the sense of they are not cancerous, but they do lead to a hormone imbalance, which is why I have such trouble getting pregnant. Now, I'm going to tell you some of the most common symptoms, and if you know me at all, of you have ever even seen a picture of me, you will probably laugh and think "but Amanda you don't have those symptoms." But just hang in there with me. The most common symptoms are acne, weight gain and trouble losing weight, excess hair, thinning hair on the scalp (I know, totally contradicts what I just said), irregular periods, anxiety/depression, and of course fertility problems.

Now, if you go to WebMD or even just do a google search for PCOS, they're going to tell you that the easiest way to be treated for PCOS is to eat healthy and lose weight.

Wait just a second here.

When I was diagnosed with PCOS I weighed in at about 110 lbs. give or take. Now, for my height and age, this was just under the normal BMI range. So here I was, 22 years old, underweight, and told that normally losing weight would help to cure my disease. Now, thankfully I am smart and realized that being under the BMI range for normal probably wasn't helping either, and since then I've put on just under 15 pounds and have been eating much more healthy and have been more active. And yet here I am still suffering from PCOS. This is going to bring me to my biggest pet peeve.

I can NOT just relax and get pregnant!

I hear this so much. "I had issues getting pregnant too. Once I relaxed and stopped worrying about it, bam, I was pregnant. Just relax, have a few glasses of wine, and you'll be fine!"

My blood is boiling just writing that out.

I hear this far too often, or friends/family of mine will say that to them about me. It is just so frustrating. Which is why I'm writing this post. People just don't understand that I have a medical issue and that it's not that I'm just having problems getting pregnant, I physically have a condition that makes it hard for me to get pregnant.

Now, in my first six months of marriage, or really even the first year, I would take that advice! I would really try hard to just relax and hope for the best. But when you don't have a period for 3 1/2 months, that means you don't ovulate, which means YOU CAN'T GET PREGNANT.

*Just a slight warning, getting a little medical here. I'm just trying to be informative and help you  understand. Let's all be adults.*

Let's all go back to that day in 5th grade when we learned about the human body shall we? Women ovulate around their 14th day of their cycle and release an egg. If intercourse has happened and sperm meets that egg, it creates life, and that egg attaches to your uterus and you become pregnant. If sperm doesn't meet the egg, it gets released and you have your period. Now, if you're like me and can't release an egg on your own, you can't get pregnant no matter how much you "relax and let it happen".

And this is where that beautiful medicine called Clomid comes in. Clomid is a fertility drug that made me release an egg for ovulation. It also came with horrible side effects (mostly hot flashes, cramps, and massive amounts of hormones). The 6 months I took clomid (June-September 2015 and January-February 2016) I actually ovulated like a normal woman and had normal cycles. But even with that, I had to take my temperature every day to see when I would actually ovulate, take lots of tests to go along side with the temping, and had to literally chart every symptom along the way, just to make sure that I actually was ovulating.

This goes completely against that "Relax and you'll get pregnant" theory you thought would help, doesn't it?

So where do we all go from here? For us, we have our first consultation at IVF New England on the 21st to meet with a specialist (who came highly recommended by friends going through similar situations, and friends who have been through this and come out the other side with precious little ones). I wasn't expecting to be able to get in so quickly, but I'm so excited to hopefully get some more answers! After spending pretty much the past year hearing "just take this pill good luck" it's nice to know that we'll be seeing someone on a regular basis who actually wants to see us succeed in becoming parents!

Now for you the reader, my friends and family and random people of the internet, I hope that this helps you to understand; understand my struggles, why I have to do some of the things I do, why I can't do some other things I want to do, and that this is a real issue, not just that we've been trying for a little while. There is a real problem, a real diagnosis, and I am a real person living with this day in and day out.

I know a lot of my friends often times will say "I don't want to be rude by asking this" or "hey can you tell me more about your diagnosis? If you don't want to you don't have to". I am ALWAYS wanting to share more about my diagnosis and help other people either understand what's going on with me, or help women who may also have PCOS but aren't open about it like I am. One in Ten woman has PCOS, and One in Five woman have troubles getting pregnant. Why is it that so many women struggle with this, and yet none of us ever talk about it??

I know this is a little more blunt and up close and personal than my normal blog posts, but I really think these things needed to be said. Even though I post about my fertility issues often on social media, I guess I never really thought about if the person reading on the other side of the screen really knew what was going on. So thank you for sticking through this post with me.

I want to leave you with this piece of scripture
"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength!" -Philippians 4:13
-Amanda